| Back from NY =) |
[15 Aug 2005|01:40am] |
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mood |
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 energetic |
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music |
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Climbing the Walls - Backstreet Boys |
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New York was fucking AWESOMEEE. Now this week, I gotta start getting ready for college yeaaaaaaaaaaa.
Damnit I need a new layout.
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[05 Aug 2005|01:47am] |
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mood |
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 depressed |
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I don't know why i still feel like this. It's been almost three weeks and I still don't feel any better. Tonight i felt the desperate need to call him and tell him how I'm feeling but something inside was telling me i shouldnt... that I need to learn to let go and move on, and that this would just be a step back. But if that's what I'm supposed to do then why isn't it working, not even a little bit? I've tried hard enough to keep myself busy and to repeat to myself that I'm ok but all i want to do is run and scream at him so that he'll reconsider.. even for just one night that we could just pretend like nothing ever happened - that's all I want. I feel so weak, so broken... especially since I always seemed to be the strong one, the one who didn't need anyone, and he was the one to always say to me how much he needed me and how important i was... And now look at me.. he seems fine, hes not the one running after me in pain.. he says he misses me, but i guess just not enough.
On another note, I got my braces off today weee.
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| BSB concert tonite! |
[22 Jul 2005|03:17pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
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I'm at my dads house cuz i had come to feed his fish and i got too lazy to drive back so im just sittin here online lol.. I have like a million mosquito bites on my legs and feet and they are killing me! Umm im pretty bored right now b/c nobody is talkin to me online lalalalaa now i have to leave cuz i have to meet jenn at my house cuz smart me decided to waste even more money... jenn wanted me to go to NY w/ her soo we just bought a ticket and i kno my mom is gonna killlllllll me lol it came out to 160 and im so damn broke it sucks =(
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[20 Jul 2005|02:53pm] |
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mood |
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 gloomy |
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music |
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Wake up- Hilary Duff |
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Soo day 2 of it all and it feels like im gonna be ok.. What hurt was basically the shock that i wasnt expecting it, but i was basically wanting the same thing anyway soo i guess it was bound to happen.. Now im just working on getting my mind off of it, which is actually pretty hard b/c my life was pretty much centered around him and now it feels like i dont have much else left.
Anywayz today is Corinas 18th bday and i had told her i wasnt gonna make any plans just in case she wanted to do sumthin so im just sittin here.. Well, at least last nite i got my mind off it all w/ jon.. he's made things feel better i guess. We went to boomers and to dennys and i dunno basically we hung out until i was too tired to be out lol soo that was fun...
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